Harri Morgan: Trust me, the support is there. You are not on your own

‘Trust me, the support is out there. You are not on your own’: Last month, ex-Ospreys star HARRI MORGAN bravely revealed he had tried to take his own life… now he’s urging people with mental health struggles to open up

• Morgan confirmed he had stepped away from professional rugby last month 
• Stress and anxiety caused by both grief and injury led to severe depression 
• The 23-year-old has had counselling and is on medication for depression 

The tattoos on Harri Morgan’s arms and legs are a reminder of his battles with mental health.

Not that the former Ospreys scrum-half needs them. Morgan, 23, confirmed he had stepped away from professional rugby last month, bravely revealing he had attempted to take his own life earlier this year after stress and anxiety caused by both grief and injury led to severe depression.

‘I’ve recently had this one done,’ Morgan tells Mail Sport, pointing to his inked leg. ‘It’s all about my story with mental health. There’s one of a guy taking his mask off and a little guy in a struggle behind that mask. There’s a man in a mask with the words “Who am I?” around it. There are quotes in Latin that are meaningful to me.

‘I’ve got the words “strength” and “courage” around a brain with wings, symbolising where I can take myself mentally. I’ve got “resilience” there, too.

‘I always said I wouldn’t get tattoos unless they were meaningful. I lost my grandparents when I was younger so there’s a tattoo on my arm reminding me of them. I’ve also got a family tree and my family’s initials, connected up with a DNA strand. They all mean I can wake up every morning and remind myself of my story and where I’ve come from.’

Harri Morgan stepped away from professional rugby after struggling with his mental health

The 23-year-old has had counselling and is on medication for depression

Sitting in a south Wales gym, it is heartening to see Morgan — who played international rugby at Under-20 level for his country — in such fine spirits after a difficult start to the year.

‘The big injuries started around the 2018-19 season,’ he explains. ‘I tore the cartilage in my knee so was out for about eight months. Not long after I tore my hip flexor and then tore it again. It was a really complicated one.

‘That was just over 12 months. It took a long time to see any kind of progress which was very tough mentally because I felt I was in a never-ending cycle of never getting better. ‘I’d get injured, get back fit, have a run of one or two games, then get another injury.

‘It was really difficult. My escape from mental health struggles was getting out on to the rugby field and that was taken away from me. It started to get really tough. It took its toll on me.

‘I’d get anxious going places. My heart rate would rise dramatically. I started getting uncomfortable going into training. I didn’t enjoy it because I had a fear of what was going to happen or getting injured.

‘I started to see physical changes like hair loss. From there I had a huge loss of confidence. I could hide my feelings but then the problems started to show externally. That led to anxiety and depression. I couldn’t sleep at night. I had thoughts racing through my head.’

Morgan has been open about his struggles with mental health, posting a statement on Twitter which revealed he hit rock bottom when he tried to take his own life with an overdose.

But he is now coming out the other side. Alongside former team-mate Reuben Morgan- Williams, he has set up HYPRO — an online fitness platform — and works one-on-one with clients. Each day in May, he has either cycled, ran or rowed 10km to raise money for LooseHeadz — rugby’s leading mental health charity. His future is now bright. Morgan has had counselling and is on medication for depression.

He hasn’t ruled out a return to rugby one day but for now his focus is on spreading the message that there should be no stigma applied to mental health. It is, Morgan says, good to talk. ‘A rugby environment is a very manly one. It was difficult to open up,’ he adds. ‘But since I have, the level of support I’ve had has been amazing.

Former Ospreys scrum-half played international rugby at Under-20 level for his country

‘I wish I’d done it sooner but it’s a big thing to take that first step. A lot of people struggle with that. I’m trying to emphasise that if you take that first step, the support is there. Don’t be afraid to open up, even if you’re in an environment where you feel like you can’t. We’re not on our own in this.’

Morgan is still involved in rugby but from the periphery. He does some part-time coaching at Swansea University and his grassroots club Nantyffyllon.

‘I’m grateful for the recovery I’ve had,’ he says. ‘I want to keep trying to raise awareness of mental health and break down the stigma of it. It’s so important we do that. There are way too many people who suffer with it and struggle to find a way out but there are a lot of ways to do so. I know the support is there.

‘I had ambitions as a player and one was to represent Wales. It hasn’t happened, but who’s to say if I go back to rugby I can’t work towards that goal? I’m not writing rugby off. But I’m massively excited about the future.’

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