The wheels finally come off at Collingwood, but not even an injury to the president can stop them

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Wheels finally fall off at Collingwood

It’s the news that the rest of the competition has been dying to hear: something has stopped Collingwood.

Unfortunately for Adelaide, it happened minutes after the nail-biting, come-from-behind win over the Crows. With a quick turnaround after the game and an evening flight back to Melbourne, it was all hands on deck packing the bus in the bowels of the Adelaide Oval.

There was only one problem – the bus wouldn’t start.

Now, the Magpies have been able to solve almost every problem thrown at them since Craig McRae took over at the helm. But not even Nick Daicos could fix a broken bus.

Kudos to the bus company; new transport arrived promptly. But, because of where the first bus broke down, the new one couldn’t squeeze past it, so it had to wait outside the oval.

All hands on deck: Pies communications boss Nadine Rabah, CEO Craig Kelly and president Jeff Browne help with the move at Adelaide Oval.Credit: Collingwood Football Club

That meant not only did the Pies have to unpack the old bus, but they had to walk through the tunnel of the car park and outside the stadium to the new one, navigating through the departing crowd (most of whom were understandably disappointed).

Eyewitnesses told The Scoop that even president Jeff Browne and chief executive Craig Kelly helped out with the heavier items, so The Scoop dug a little deeper and tracked down photographic evidence.

The story gets better (and worse). It turns out that Browne was actually playing hurt. After suffering severe pain in his groin after Collingwood’s win over St Kilda in Adelaide, Browne went straight to the club doctor in the rooms, where he was quickly diagnosed with a hernia.

“He loaded me up with Nurofen, but the problem is, I can’t get it operated on until mid-May. Loading a couple of heavy trunks into a truck was the last thing I bloody needed,” Browne said.

“But, as we’ve proven on the field, even injury off the field won’t prevent us from finding our best when we need to.”

Is there anything Collingwood can’t do?

Harder than it looks

In the days before and after Andrew Dillon was finally confirmed as the AFL’s next CEO, Gillon McLachlan and Richard Goyder went out of their way to publicly defend the 13-month process to appoint a successor.

McLachlan told 3AW that he was yet to meet one fan at a game that complained about the process. Meanwhile, Goyder, while sitting next to Dillon, said he’d spoken to all 18 clubs who fully supported the time it took to decide.

AFL Commission chair Richard Goyder, incoming CEO Andrew Dillon and outgoing chief Gillon McLachlan.Credit: AFL Photos

It’s not a view that’s universally held within the industry. Since Monday’s announcement, this column has spoken to six clubs (four chief executives and two presidents) who all unanimously – albeit anonymously – expressed their exasperation with the drawn-out saga.

But clubs aren’t the only major stakeholders in the game.

Former Seven boss Tim Worner, who ran the network for the best part of a decade until 2019, has leapt to the defence of Goyder and the commission.

“I think Richard Goyder has been unfairly targeted,” Worner told The Scoop. “They may have looked under every rock to find the right person, but they did exactly that. Andrew Dillon is the best person for the job and he should feel good about this.”

Worner also took aim at any clubs who had complained, saying that things look far easier from the outside.

“With the exception of Andrew Pridham at Sydney, the AFL presidents have to be the most ornery group of people you could ever put together. They’re always complaining about something,” he said.

“It was an extremely thorough process.

“It’s like skiing or surfing. It looks really easy when you’re watching from the shore or the bottom of the mountain, but when you’re actually on a wave or a slope, the reality is much, much harder.”

Keeping it cryptic

The AFL has long had a taste for the theatrical when it comes to launches. Despite the entire football world knowing the league was going to announce a 19th club licence for a team in Tasmania on Wednesday, the AFL media team sent out a cryptic email at precisely 6pm on Tuesday that read: “AFL chief executive Gillon McLachlan has tonight provided an update following a meeting today of all 18 club presidents and this afternoon a meeting of the AFL Commission.

“See you in Tassie tomorrow.”

Cue a lighthearted eye roll.

The league then followed up on Wednesday with an update for travelling media: “Due to weather, location to be confirmed shortly”.

Good thing the new stadium is going to have a roof.

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