OLIVER HOLT: Woods wears air of a man surprised by his own stupidity

OLIVER HOLT: Tiger Woods still wears the air of a man endlessly surprised by his own stupidity. The last thing golf needed was Tiger and the Tampon but the sport can’t shake its addiction to him

• Tiger Woods served up a non-apology apology after his tampon joke last week 
• Woods apologised for giving Justin Thomas a tampon at the Genesis Invitational 
• Most of us have long stopped being surprised by Woods’ endless stupidity

Perhaps it is an inevitable corollary of his fame, his achievements and the sycophancy that surrounds him in the sport he plays but even now, even after so many grievous and self-inflicted wounds, Tiger Woods still wears the air of a man who is endlessly surprised by the repercussions of his own stupidity. For most of the rest of us, the surprise wore off a long time ago.

Woods’ latest lesson in the real-world consequences that exist outside his weird bubble reads like this: if you think it is hilarious to slip your best buddy a tampon as you’re walking off the ninth tee at a tournament because he didn’t drive the ball as far as you, and you do it in front of the television cameras, you are going to provoke a new round of debate about lingeringly misogynistic attitudes towards women’s sport.

Woods chose to indulge in that little jape last week as he and double major winner Justin Thomas strode towards the turn at the Genesis Invitational in Los Angeles, Woods’ first competitive PGA Tour event since missing the cut at The Open in July, and a tournament that was supposed to be the stage for a Woods feel-good story, another step in his comeback from the car crash two years ago which left him with serious leg injuries.

If you’ve forgotten the details of that car crash, by the way, it occurred when Woods was driving at speeds of up to 87mph in a 45mph zone on Hawthorne Boulevard in Palos Verdes, California, lost control of his car, crossed the central reservation, drove into the opposite lanes and smashed into a tree.

Thankfully, he survived. Thankfully, he has recovered enough from his injuries to be able to walk again and play golf competitively again. He was not charged with any driving offences but it is important to remember that if anyone had been coming in the opposite direction on Hawthorne Boulevard that morning, they could easily have been killed. No one, Woods included, ever talks about that.

Tiger Woods (left) caused a stir by handing Justin Thomas a tampon at the Genesis Invitational

Woods continues to appear to be surprised by the repercussions of his own stupidity 

Woods is 47 now, which is a little old to be behaving like a pubescent teenager, either behind the wheel or on the golf course, in possession of a tampon for his own amusement. But then taking responsibility for his actions is not something he has ever embraced. 

‘This is Tiger,’ Michael Johnson, the great Olympic champion, wrote on Twitter last week. ‘Never been a leader and he’s Teflon. Still heralded after all the mistakes so he’s learned nothing. Media focus always on miraculous recovery. Never why the need for recovery.’

Johnson is absolutely right, of course. Golf is addicted to Woods. It still needs him. It cannot let him go, particularly now, when it is weaponising him and Rory McIlroy in the battle against the Saudi-backed LIV breakaway and using him as one of the central figures in a struggle caricatured as good against evil, particularly now, as the annual obsession with Woods’ tilt at the US Masters in April begins to gather speed.

Woods issued a non-apology apology that was a classic of its genre in the aftermath of the ‘joke’ he played on Thomas. He said it was just guys joshing around, the way guys do. 

‘We play pranks on one another all the time,’ he said, although he did not say whether the pranks always involved women’s sanitary products and whether they always equated women with inferiority.

By then, the damage had been done anyway. Anyone who objected to Woods’ ‘joke’, anyone who pointed out that it belittled women’s sport, anyone who pointed out it was pathetically out of step with attempts to make sport more accessible for women and banish the taboo about talking about the effects of women’s periods on sporting performance, was accused of lacking a sense of humour.

Mostly, of course, that meant men telling women what they should find funny. 

Christine Brennan, the USA Today columnist wrote a typically fine piece accusing Woods of employing ‘basic misogyny to insult his good friend Thomas, a knee-slapper of a dig against female athletes: You hit the ball like a girl!’ She was rewarded with a stream of abusive replies from offended men.

‘Don’t hurt yourself clutching those pearls, Karen,’ one read. ‘I hope he does it again and other golfers too, just for you sweet thang,’ was another. ‘Sounds like it’s that time of the month for Christine,’ was another. 

Brennan doesn’t need anyone to defend her, by the way. She tends to ignore neanderthals. But the responses were instructive, nonetheless. Woods’ idea of a joke, and the fact that so many have rushed to support him, suggest golf still has a big problem with women.

Golf is addicted to Woods and we are near the annual obsession of him winning the Masters 

Compare Woods (left) to Andy Murray (right), an athlete who speaks out for women in sport

Compare Woods’ attitude to, say, Andy Murray’s in tennis. Remember the time at Wimbledon in 2017 when a reporter asked him a question in a press conference. ‘Andy,’ the question went, ‘Sam Querrey is the first American player to reach the semi-final of a Slam since 2009.’ Murray interrupted him. ‘Male player,’ Murray pointed out. It was an important symbolic moment for the sport.

Golf is not without equivalents. Justin Rose and his wife Kate are champions of the women’s game in this country. 

After launching the Rose Ladies Series during the pandemic, they have extended their support to women’s golf with the launch of the Rose Ladies Open on the Ladies European Tour’s Access Series. And the sport, in general, is desperately trying to modernise attitudes.

The last thing it needed was Tiger and the Tampon. The last thing it needed was the man many regard as the world’s greatest golfer, a man golf needs as an ambassador as his playing career comes to an end, pouring scorn on women’s sport.

We are addicted to him, all of us, because he is one of the greatest sportsmen of his generation, because he is box office, because he is a genius, because he has won 15 Majors. But his idea of a joke was a reminder that he lives a double life, as golf’s greatest asset and its biggest embarrassment.

POPE DOESN’T DESERVE TO MISS WEMBLEY FINAL 

I understand the rules and I understand that it’s too late to change them but it is not right that Newcastle goalkeeper Nick Pope should have to miss the Carabao Cup final against Manchester United on Sunday. 

Pope was, quite rightly, sent off against Liverpool on Saturday evening for a deliberate handball that denied a clear goalscoring opportunity but the punishment doesn’t fit the crime. 

Pope made his error of judgment in a league game so all logic suggests he should serve his one-match ban in Newcastle’s next league game, away at Manchester City on March 4. That would be fair and proportionate. But the rules for a red card mean he has to miss the final, which would have been the biggest match of his life. 

It’s the law but in this case, the law’s an ass.

Nick Pope’s punishment for his red card against Liverpool on Saturday does not fit the crime

DAVIES WILL LIVE ON 

I know it’s a cliché but when I was a kid back in the 1970s, my grandma loved watched the wrestling on television and so, on Saturday afternoons, even though I secretly leaned towards Grandstand, World of Sport was the order of the day in our house. That meant time in the company of Mick McManus, who my grandma loathed with all her soul, Kendo Nagasaki, Giant Haystacks and, of course, the World of Sport presenter, Dickie Davies. 

I loved Davies almost as much as I loved David Coleman because they were the faces and the voices of sport in my childhood. 

Jim Rosenthal, another of the presenting greats, announced the news that Davies had died at the weekend but he will always live on in my mind whenever I think of Saturday afternoons lost in sport in the front room at 7 Heyes Lane.

Dickie Davies was best known for his time presenting hit ITV sports show – World of Sport

BOLTON IS NO JOKE 

Another sense of humour failure on my part: there was much amusement last week when Bolton Wanderers announced a new five-year stadium naming rights deal with local recyclable building product manufacturer, Toughsheet. 

From July, the ground will be known as the Toughsheet Community Stadium. 

I’m sorry to be miserable but deals like this make a laughing stock out of a proud old club like Bolton. 

They bring the club cash but they cheapen its heritage. Get a laugh out of it if you want but it’s just another sign of the desperate times lower league clubs are facing.

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