‘Still see her as my firstborn’: The tragedy driving Tevita Pangai Junior
When Tevita Pangai Junior steps into the boxing ring on Saturday night, he will do so with the names of both his children inscribed on his trunks.
It is Pangai’s way of honouring young son Kilu and Georgia, the daughter he lost.
“We had a stillborn,” Pangai said. “It definitely hurt. I didn’t get much time to mourn, I went straight back to Penrith to try to help them to a grand final and then I went straight into a fight. I didn’t get time to mourn. I could see it was affecting me here and there. I feel like I’m in a good place now.
“God blessed us with another child, it’s been good for me and my wife. It still can’t take away that pain that I’ve got. I still see her as my firstborn. [Kilu] will be here on my trunks and my daughter’s name will be on my trunks too.”
It’s been more than a year since Pangai and his wife Anna had to deal with the tragic stillbirth of Georgia 24 weeks into the pregnancy. The arrival of Kilu and the passing of time hasn’t been enough to totally dull the pain.
“It’s been tough,” Pangai said. “I know there are people out there [going through similar things]; the nurses were saying there are three to five stillborns a day in Australia.
Tevita Pangai Junior at Tony Mundine Gym in Redfern ahead of his fight against Jeremiah Tupai-Ui on Saturday. Credit:Flavio Brancaleone
“I suffer from it. Apparently, I’m a big, tough footy player, but I struggle. Sometimes I find myself, not depressed, but a little bit down, just thinking about it. I try to look forward in life and look after things here. It’s something other people have gone through.”
Saturday’s fight, against Jeremiah Tupai-Ui on the undercard of the Sonny Bill Williams-Mark Hunt heavyweight showdown at Sydney’s Aware Super Theatre, is a chance not only to honour Georgia, but also get his footballing career back on track. By his own admission, the Bulldogs forward “let the club down” with his performances last season and has vowed to make amends.
To that end, with the blessing of Canterbury supremo Phil Gould, Pangai opted out of the Tongan team for the World Cup in order to get himself into the best physical and mental shape by working out alongside Williams. The 26-year-old has slimmed down to a trim 110kg and credits the cross-code star for teaching him how to be a true professional on and off the field.
“He makes you feel like crap actually,” Pangai said when asked about Williams. “He’s 37 and still killing me in fitness. We’re actually pretty close now; when I first came in I was struggling, doing half of what he was doing. Now I’ve built up. It’s been good, I really appreciate Sonny coming in and giving me those tips.”
“It still can’t take away that pain that I’ve got. I still see her as my firstborn.”
The Bulldogs need more from Pangai, particularly after the shock retirement of fellow forward and captain Josh Jackson. Williams has witnessed enough of a transformation in Pangai to suggest he should be considered for a leadership role at the club.
“Of course. Why not?” Williams said. “Like a lot of Island brothers, we are stoic, we lead through our actions. He’s done the hard yards the last couple of months. Look at his body shape, how he moves and looks.
“God willing, he puts on a mad performance on Saturday, which I’m sure he will. It’s a springboard going into the 2023 season.
“In 2011, I fought for the New Zealand title and the next year with the Chiefs we had an outstanding [title-winning] season. Then the next year I came off the [Francois] Botha fight and we won the comp with the Roosters, we had a pretty good season.
“I know that [the fight[ will put him into the best space mentally and physically going into a long footy season. It’s his time to shine.”
Watch SBW v Hunt live & exclusive on Stan Event on Saturday, November 5. New customers can sign up to a Stan free trial and can purchase the Pay-Per-View at stan.com.au/event.
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